You love people since you learned to love yourself. Not the way you want to be, but just the way you are

Karel Staes

Judge Softly: from tunnel vision to wisdom

Judging is part of being human. We cannot not judge. Judgments steer our thinking, feeling and doing. And that’s why we live most of time subconsciously with a tunnel vision. That is too bad, since we miss so much in our lives, interactions and relations with others and ourselves. 

I had a successful career as a consultant in both Amsterdam and New York. When I couldn’t combine my career with our family and the pregnancy of my third child forced me to stay on bedrest for seven weeks in a hospital-bed, my life and self-image came to a stand-still abruptly. I discovered how harsh I judged myself, others and the environment I lived in. With the fall away of my job it felt I also lost my identity. Who is Anne-Barbara? I knew one thing for sure; I judged.

Out of my fascination about judgments and the wish to live an enriched life, I dove deeply into the world of judgments. My research- and awareness-process lead me along insights gained from the Western neuroscience, philosophy and psychology and Eastern experiential learnings like mindfulness, insight dialogue, non-dualism and Buddhism. Out of which I developed Judge Softly; the path of becoming aware, reviewing and accepting to wise communication.  

This book brings you along in my discovery of the reason and consequences of my judgments and the transformation towards judging softly. From giving subconscious automatic reactions to conscious responses, so that trust, connection and resilience arise. This leads to true wisdom in every interaction with yourself and others. 

Order the book here (in Dutch only for now) and get 20% off the Judge Softly 30-day challenge